Fri, 15 Oct 2010 09:10:05 -0800WeeblyTue, 15 Jun 2010 10:56:33 -0800http://howtowinyourspouseback.weebly.com/1/post/2010/06/win-back-her-heart.htmlObviously when you lose someone you love, it hurts! Hurt feelings can take a long time to heal. You don't know what to do, where to turn and you are feeling desperate, sad and lonely. You need to calm down and think about your next step. If you want to win back her heart, there are steps to take that do work. It all depends on you as you are the one that has to change to have a go at getting your girlfriend back.

Some of the things you need to do are going to be extremely difficult. Probably your first inclination is to call her and try to be with her. In my opinion that will only serve to push her further away. Give her some time to think and some room to breathe. Even if you suspect there is another guy, all is not lost. Patience is the key to success here. Do not contact her by calling, emailing or texting. Do not shadow her every movement. Do not try to find out what she is doing through friends. Sometimes absence really does make the heart grow fonder. This is very hard to do since all you want to do is be with the person you love. Trust me, been there, done that with boyfriends too. You may be pleasantly surprised and get a call from her.
Can You Win Back Her Heart?

If she calls, you can start the ball rolling. If she hasn't called, let at least one week pass before you even think to contact her. When you do, don't push her to meet with you or take you back. Play it cool. You can tell her you have been thinking a lot about your relationship and trying to make changes in yourself. Of course you really do need to make these changes. In so doing, if she sees those changes, she will be more likely to work on herself. Have you ever been in a situation where there was a disagreement between you and a friend or family member? If that person apologizes to you, aren't you most likely to accept that and even apologize back? It is the same with changing the disagreeable things about yourself. If she sees a change in you, she may want to work on her issues too. Don't be fake on this just to get her back. It will never work in the long run if you are just changing to win back her heart.

After a few conversations, she may be agreeable to meet. Take it slow and don't expect that this is a date. You can meet for coffee or ice cream. Take this as a positive sign towards a reconciliation - but definitely not a date. It probably took a long time for your relationship to deteriorate so don't expect an overnight magic of making up to occur. Talk about fun stuff and actually have fun and laugh remembering the good times you shared. Try to spark an interest in what brought you together in the first place. If she always liked your laugh, then laugh often. If she liked your jokes, tell some good ones. If she liked a certain shirt that perhaps she even purchased for you, wear that shirt. There are many little touching things you can do to show her you care. Above all, be patient. It may take several of these meetings before she is ready to try again with you. You will need to become her friend for isn't that the solid foundation that all couples must share to stay together? Be that solid foundation and offer much support. Women are ruled by their feelings and emotions. You must genuinely care about her feelings and in turn she must be willing to care about yours.

At some point, both of you should be able to address the mistakes that were made so you do not repeat the past. This can be hard because it dredges up old hurts. Be extremely careful not to be defensive or judgmental. The past is the past and you both really will need to get over it to move on. Letting go can be difficult and if you both cannot do this, then you may never walk down the road to reconciliation.

Lastly, make sure the chemistry is still there by being physically appealing. Maybe you will need to exercise to tone up or lose a little weight. Grooming is important. For me, there is no greater turnoff than an unclean person. Appearances do matter. ]]>Thu, 03 Jun 2010 16:36:01 -0800http://howtowinyourspouseback.weebly.com/1/post/2010/06/getting-back-a-girlfriend.htmlHere are several tips that may help you in getting your girlfriend back.

1.  Before you do anything, take some time to learn what went wrong in your relationship. Were you too needy? Were you overly critical of the things she did? Could she count on you or were you often late or cancel your date at the last minute? Did you cheat on her? Did you value her opinions? The reason for the breakup may determine if you even have a chance at being together again. Obviously some reasons are harder to overcome than others. In my opinion, cheating is one of them. If that has happened, be prepared to work very hard to get your gal back.

2.  While you are reflecting on what went wrong, do not contact her. For one reason or another, she left you and you need to back off and give her some space. This is probably one of the hardest things to do but it is extremely important not to hound her. There is a two-fold reason for not contacting her. First, you will give her the time she needs and second she may actually start to miss you. Acting desperate is a turnoff. When the time comes to get in touch again, you will have to act upbeat instead of sad and depressed.

3.  When you have given your separation some time and figured out your plan, you are ready to get in touch with her but do it sparingly. Do not beg her to get back together again. Do not constantly apologize saying everything was your fault. Keep things light and friendly. Tell her that the breakup was a good thing as it has given you time to reflect on the relationship and get a new perspective on life. You can suggest that you remain friends and possibly see each other every now and then. Her answer to you will give you some indication as to whether she is open to being around you.

Getting Back A Girlfriend

Once you get to the point the she is agreeable to seeing you, then follow these tips.

1.  Come across as confident. Act positive rather than negative. Having fun when you are together will bring her back to the time when your relationship was easy. Try to keep everything casual and laid back. Do not make moves towards intimacy. Slowly you can begin to discuss what you felt you did wrong in the relationship as you thought a lot about it.

2.  If jealousy was an issue before, work very hard to control the impulse to act jealous. Avoid acting in ways that were disturbing to your previous relationship. Keep your time together civil with no fighting. Don't give her a reason to believe you haven't changed as she probably will be looking for this. Change your bad habits for good, not just to win her back. It will prove to her that you are sincere in wanting to be together again.

3.  Do some things that are of interest to her. If you know she likes a certain place to eat, take her there. Try to do little things that make her know you are thinking about her. For instance, bring her a coffee from her favorite place. If you saw in the paper that there is going to be a sale at her favorite store, let her know. Text her goodnight one evening out of the blue. Keep these things simple in the beginning. Avoid buying her expensive gifts. That is something you won't be able to keep up so in the long run it will just look like you purchased her things to get her back. Better to do little things that she would never think you would do for her.

4.  Don't be fake just to win her back. If you are in this for the long haul, make the necessary changes and in turn maybe she will make some needed changes too.

These are some ideas that you can implement when getting back a girlfriend. Be patient as there is not quick fix for this situation. Each case is different so spend some real time reflecting on what went wrong before you try to get back together again.

Now that you know some of the needed steps to take, you can read more about getting back a girlfriend. Don't get stuck in counter-productive behavior if you are serious about being with the one you love. The more information you have, the closer to reconciliation you may be.
]]>Wed, 26 May 2010 23:38:50 -0800http://howtowinyourspouseback.weebly.com/1/post/2010/05/how-to-win-your-spouse-back-repair-your-broken-marriage.htmlTreat your spouse like you did when you first met and chances are you will have a strong marriage. It is not realistic to feel that relationships can sustain the level of romance and excitement that first began when you met but you do need to try and keep things fresh. If your marriage is headed down the wrong path, there are specific things you can do to change the course. Changing the way you treat your spouse can really turn the tables when your spouse wants to leave you. These changes can range from subtle to very obvious.

Winning your spouse back starts with you. You must take responsibility for your own actions and your own part in the difficulties that you are now facing. Acknowledge that unless you change some things about yourself, your marriage will probably fail. Consistent daily effort is what is need to have a healthy, strong and long marriage. Take a hard look at the qualities you possess that may be turning your partner away. If you have decided to make some changes in hopes of resolving your relationship issues, then do so 100%. You must start with yourself and in time your partner will see these changes.

Learn How To Win Your Spouse Back

It would be beneficial to discuss at length what you both feel is the root of the problem. Is there a lot of jealousy going on? Is communication all but gone with both of you on the defense and ready to fight? Is one spouse putting in more effort than the other? Do you respect each others roles in your relationship? Are resentments setting in because of a lack of discussing problems? Are raising the kids or your jobs just too stressful? Is money a problem that is constantly causing hardships? Is your spouse cheating? Many of these situations exist in marriages today but it is how they are handled that makes the difference on whether your marriage stays on good terms or not. Relationships are work - there is no way around this. By sharing what is in your heart with your spouse, you can achieve a deeper intimacy.

Sometimes time spent apart is needed for people to sort out their feelings especially if arguments are happening frequently. A common mistake couples make is when one person is constantly arguing, contacting the other spouse at work by either calling, texting or emailing. Never use the kids as a bargaining chip or threaten that the other parent won't get to see them if they leave. You will need to get out of this emotional state to think clearly. Contrary to what you may think, your world will not fall apart if there is a separation. It may be needed to sort things out. If there is a separation, use it to your benefit. Read information on how to change yourself. Find out what other people did to save their marriage. Transform yourself and work on areas you feel will be beneficial to a relationship.

Consider marriage counseling. Often times it is the last resort as some people refuse to do this. A third party perspective may be just the thing that is needed. People can have an opinion about themselves that is not the reality. This would be a neutral party hearing both sides but taking neither. If counseling is refused by one partner, go yourself. Any feedback can be helpful and give you insight as to what your next step may be.
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